gift ideas

December 8, 2008

I got this an e-mail today about holiday gifts from Herbal Remedies. Check out the middle of the front page for some cheap presents, including some stuff my from Burts Bees — my favorite. Great place for klutzes who are into all-natural fixes!


afraid of athletics

November 4, 2008

I think the first rule of thumb for every klutz is to stay away from sports. The only sports I’ve ever been involved in is marching band and even that was often a risk since I was on the color guard and swinging a 6-foot metal pole around.

I recently came across one woman’s blog that discusses atheletes’ injuries. The author said that athletes tend to pride themselves on their injuries rather than hide them. I always thought that klutzes tried to hide their embarrassing injuries, but I was surprised to find that I agreed with the logic.

I’ve come in contact with a lot of klutzy people in college, and they all wear their scars and bruises like a badge — whether it’s to warn others to stay away of them because they are so accident-prone or because they actually aren’t embarrassed of being a klutz, I don’t know.

After more thought, I realized I definitely don’t hide my injuries. In fact, I tend to wait in anticipation to tell my friends about my newest debacles. Could being a klutz be more than an inherited issue? Could it have something to do with attention? Just a thought…


October 30, 2008

Halloween is a nightmare for most clumsy people — costumes can be a death trap for many of us.

I spoke to a local police officer to find some general safety tips for everyone:

  1. When driving on Halloween night watch out for children walking along the road in neighborhoods. If you are walking with your children, make sure children stay off the road, especially when a car is coming.
  2. Wear something reflective on your costume and your child’s costume to help cars see you.
  3. Do not wear masks that limit your field of vision. Such masks could impair your ability to properly watch for children or cars.
  4. Do not eat opened or unusual looking candy — it could be tampered with.
  5. Do a FDLE Sex offender online search of your neighborhood to know where the offenders are in your neighborhood. Go to for more information.

Personally, I’ve sprayed hair dye on my face instead of my hair too many times to count. And what child has never worn a costume that was too long for them and ended up scraping their knees by the end of the night?

So, here’s my list of safety tips that every klutz should follow closely, especially around Halloween:

  1. Make sure that the nozzle is pointed in the direction you want it BEFORE you start spraying (ie. hair spray and fake blood).
  2. Don’t wear shoes that make an injury more likely (ie. heels and shoes that are too big)
  3. Read warnings on any products before you use them in your mouth (glow sticks are toxic if you bite them and the liquid escapes into your mouth and some fake blood is not meant to be put in your mouth).
  4. Don’t wear costumes that drag on the ground because they increase your chances of tripping (either because you step on the ends or someone else does).
  5. Don’t wear costumes that make “wardrobe malfunctions” more likely.

Here are some good suggestions for parents of clumsy kids.

And as far as pumpkin carving goes — you better have all possible clean-up/medical supplies at hand and a guaranteed ride to the ER, just in case. This a great alternative to carving pumpkins, especially if you have young children!

murphy’s law

October 9, 2008

Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong.

Murphy must have been a klutz to have said something so true.

If you have a problem with Murphy’s law in your professional life, this blog offers some words of wisdom, such as: if you can’t do without it, make sure you don’t have to.

If you check that blog out, make sure to look back at the first post because it gives some really great explanations of how Murphy’s law interferes in everyday life for everyone.

And if you ever have a really bad day and you think that Murphy is looking down and laughing at you, just read this blog and you will instantly feel better about your day.

solution to scarring

September 12, 2008

In the past week, I have acquired four new scars. Three came from the burns that my inner klutz helped me get, and a fourth came from a rather large scrape on my leg from trying to climb a stone wall — don’t ask.

Scars have never really bothered me, but I’ve never had a bad one. However, this may be the end of my lucky streak — the two burns on my elbow have turned into very…interesting scars that look as if I tried to cut my weenis off with scissors (see last post).

So, for the first time in my life, I’m on the lookout for some good techniques to reduce the appearance of scars. WebMD surprisingly gave a lot of different options for treating scars. My favorites were surgery (cut open the scar that is caused by a cut — interesting), steroid injection and radiotherapy.

I’m not quite that desperate to get rid of my scars, yet — and frankly, I can’t see spending that much money on treatment.

I know there are hundreds of creams and gels I could buy, but I’m more interested in home remedies — because they don’t contain harsh chemicals and tend to be cheaper.

Two interesting methods I found on my search were onion extract and tropical honey. According to this article, both methods have proven antibacterial and anti-inflammatory properties. I’m not sure how great it would feel to have sticky honey on my elbow, though — or smelly onion extract, for that matter.

Several sites, including this blog, suggested vitamin E. According to the blog, vitamin E increases the elasticity of skin which helps to keep scars from forming in newly healed wounds (like mine). However, it also sites a few studies that show that the vitamin has no effect, or a negative effect, on scarring.

So, with no really realistic home remedies, the search continues…

why i’m an expert…

September 2, 2008

Trevi Fountain, Rome, Italy

Trevi Fountain, Rome, Italy

Not many people can say that they have fallen into the Trevi Fountain or slid down a few steps while climbing Angkor Wat. Of course, not many people have an inner klutz like mine.

My inner klutz doesn’t only come with me abroad, though. It’s with me all day, every day.

After burning myself twice in the past week in two different ways (two second-degree burns from a hair straightener and two small burns from the eye of the stove), I decided I’m not going to take it anymore.

I’m going to start exploring my options and have a more open relationship with my klutz — it’s not like we’re married! I should be able to go out without it bothering me.

I’m thinking that balance will help, so I plan to start taking yoga classes to become a more balanced person overall. To start, I found this great blog post about yoga’s benefits and basic poses.

I’m also going to deal with the clumsy times as they come — which they inevitably will. For those times when your inner klutz shows up uninvited, I will offer some remedies that have helped me in the past and some new ones.

So, read on until your klutz is gone!